newfie medical terms, sent to me by andy's dad!

Laura needs to make sure she knows these terms before she comes home this
summer.
Artery - The study of paintings
Benign - What you be after you be eight
Bacteria - Back door to cafeteria
Barium - What doctors do when patients die
Caesarean Section - A neighbourhood in Rome
Catscan - Searching for Kitty
Cauterize - Made eye contact with her
Colic - A sheep dog
Coma - A punctuation mark
D&C - Where Washington is
Dilate - To live long
Enema - Not a friend
Fester - Quicker than someone else
Fibula - A small lie
Genital - Non-Jewish person
G.I.Series - World Series of military baseball
Hangnail - What you hang your coat on
Impotent - Distinguished, well known
Labour Pain - Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff - A Doctor's cane
Morbid - A higher offer than I bid
Nitrates - Cheaper than day rates
Node - I knew it
Outpatient - A person who has fainted
Pap Smear - A fatherhood test
Pelvis - Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative - A letter carrier
Recovery Room - Place to do upholstery
Rectum - Darn near killed him
Secretion - Hiding something
Seizure - Roman emperor
Tablet - A small table
Terminal Illness - Getting sick at the airport
Tumour - More than one
Urine - Opposite of you're out
Varicose - Near by